Tuesday, October 30, 2007 --- Does this ever happen to you?

Do you ever use a product for a period of time, and then, it just kind of stops working? Like a favorite shampoo or conditioner? Well, this Degree deodorant has quit on me. It just doesn't last the whole day like it should. I begin to smell, what the man and I affectionately refer to as, "a little French". Yeah, I know that is not a terribly politically correct thing to say, but I do mean it affectionately. Really. Honestly, I tend to agree with people that Americans are a little too obsessed with deodorants, germs, etc. I don't really mind my smell, but I would like to earn it first, you know? Like if I don't shower for 2-3 days, I expect to smell a bit and that's fine. You can even sort of delight in the natural-smelling funk, I think. But a deodorant, by its very American nature, should last more than 4-5 hours in my opinion. I think it has something to do with this Invisible Formula not having as much oomph as the regular Degree. It was time for something new.

That said, on our recent trip to the grocery store, I bought some different deodorants. I saw that Degree had changed its look -- its probably the same shit in a new package -- but I am optimistically hoping that maybe they have improved the invisible formula and it will go back to working for me. I am giving them another chance to continue deodorizing my fabulous armpits because this one is "little black dress approved". Alrighty then, I ask you, how could I go wrong with that?

In the meantime, I also thought I would try out something completely different. I have seen the commercials for this Dove deodorant in which the "real women" tried it for 7 days and their underarm skin was softer, smoother when shaving and the deodorant was also not leaving any white crap on their clothes -- as evidenced by the voluntarily sporting of their current shirts inside-out for the cameras. Wow. Sounds good to me. But, another factor I consider in buying any new products (tell me if you do this too?), I have to smell-test things before I buy. Yes, you will find me in the grocery store aisle, popping off one deodorant top after another and smelling them to make sure they are not too "perfumey", or what I like to call "whoofy". I do this with shampoos, hairspray, whatever. I think it is a form of Product OCD that I do not want to be counseled for. I absolutely hate the intense baby powder smells of many deodorants. I dislike smells that are so strong that they would overpower what little perfume/cologne I may decide to wear that day. I like a nice mild scent that only smells when I choose to stick my nose in my armpit and smell it directly. (You know you do this, too. Don't lie!) So, I tried this new Dove Cool Essentials with Cucumber and Green Tea Scent, and, I am L-O-V-I-N-G, loving it! I have been smelling my armpits off and on all day and it has a perfectly mild, hardly-there scent, that smells great...oh yeah, and it has worked all day...I am not French at all! I endorse this product thus far. It remains to be seen how irresistibly soft my armpits become as a result of its ongoing use. I'll let you all know.

Now, everyone, go smell your pits! Fly that freak flag high! You know you wanna...

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Saturday, October 27, 2007 --- WooHoo! My Twitter shirt has arrived, but it's too small...Technically, that would make it a BooHoo.

I tried to take a picture of my new (FREE!) Twitter T-shirt in the mirror, but then realized it was blurry...which is why I didn't bother to horizontal flip it for you bloggers to read correctly. This is my way of visually expressing how annoyed I am that I did not specify in my request for an XL that it be a MENS XL, not a WOMENS XL!

Okay, here's a better picture pointing the camera directly at my...ahem...twits.

Normally, these girlie-sized tees are fine -- if they are made in a stretchier fabric that gives a little bit when you need to move! And sure, I know the male bloggers (and some of the female ones, too) are probably not complaining about the way boobs look in it...But, it is not very comfortable to wear when you feel like you are in a hot brown straight-jacket.

I wrote Crystal at Twitter Support another email to request an XL MENS so that I can sleep in my Twitter shirt -- like I had originally intended -- comfortably. Hopefully, they will send me another one...Yes, mom, I asked them nicely!

I am boiling -- I need a cool beverage!

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Thursday, October 25, 2007 --- Some things I would trade for a spleen...I mean, a Spleenal action figure!

This is a post for my blogging buddy, spleenal. He's swapping spleenal action figures (blank ones for bloggers to decorate themselves, and then, share pictures of their creations to post on his blog!) for neato things of your own. So, Spleenal, here's what I've got in lieu of splosh porn...

For the spleenal Christmas tree -- a handmade ornament from New Hampshire -- a wooden bluebird on a perch. Or, if you happen to be Jewish, he could hang out in a bushy houseplant just for fun? OR...

A funny little bug in a box, complete with wiggly legs that move when you shake him? OR...

A little wire wind-up robot that jumps around on his rubber-booted feet?

Whaddya think? I tried to think of cool little things of mine that were inexpensive (as per your guideline) while still fun...in the spirit of my toys for your toys!

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Tuesday, October 23, 2007 --- Hiro Nakamura screen test.

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Monday, October 22, 2007 --- Ok, my bloggy friends, let's try this again...Starbuck's Song of the Day Swap, Sweetened.

Since no one has stopped by here lately to take me up on my Starbuck's Song of the Day Swap offer -- I have gained another extra Song of the Day card. So, now we have 2, count 'em, 2 FREE songs to trade for other different songs -- OR, you can trade something else interesting! Whatchagot??

You people may force me to throw in a custom designed banner or Flash animation for your blog, but I hope it doesn't come to that...You'll have to be trading something pretty good for me to whore myself out! ;-D

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--- Amazing moments in Karaoke!

He needs to work on the physical aspects of his Axl impression, but the voice part is pretty great, considering the probable level of intoxication...

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Saturday, October 20, 2007 --- Wanna Swap? Starbuck's Trading Card Day!

Okay, so, you know how Starbuck's has this Song of the Day promotion going on with iTunes? Well, today, the man and I went to Starbuck's and we received 2 cards -- obviously, we don't need both. Anybody out there got an extra card you don't need from another day that you wanna swap for today's (10/20/07) song? No Kenny Chesney, please.

Drop me an email and we can exchange download codes -- 'cause hey, free music is fun!

If you don't have a Starbuck's card, but have something else cool to trade, let me know. I'm open. Besides, it might be more fun to do a "totally random items, interweb swap meet..." Whatchagot, bloggy friends?

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Friday, October 19, 2007 --- I must have you, Lime NmG...I love you!

Oh, if only I were independently wealthy...you'd be on your way from Ohio to my loving arms NmG! *sighs*

See what this little cutie is all about at the Myers Motors website.

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Wednesday, October 17, 2007 --- Non Sequitur Day...The neighbors are cooking weird-smelling food and I love this T-shirt!

Yeah, my thoughts for today are a little bit disjointed because I am having a bad stomach ache and headache combo, with a side of gas. That said, my neighbors are cooking weird smelling food that is kind of making me feel sicker. In an effort to cheer myself up...I give you this picture from the very funny WWW.BUSTEDTEES.COM! Whenever you feel down, the T-shirts can give you a good dose of giggle.

Now, I'm going to excuse myself to the bathroom...

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Tuesday, October 16, 2007 --- Hi, My Name is Butterfly. I am a Vicks VapoRub addict and I have been clean now for...about 16 hours!

Apparently, I am not the only abuser of Vicks VapoRub out there. However, unlike Aunt Jackie (see yesterday's comment section), I have never eaten Vicks -- I am strictly a "sebaceous nasal abuser" of the substance. As part of my recovery program, I am required to do this Public Service Announcement on the proper usage of Vicks VapoRub...

According to my jar (and the Vicks website), the DIRECTIONS FOR USE are as follows:

See important warnings under "When using this product."

* Adults and children 2 years and over:
  • Rub a thick layer on chest and throat or rub on sore, aching muscles.
  • Cover with a warm, dry cloth if desired.
  • Keep clothing loose about throat/chest to help vapors reach the nose/mouth.
  • Repeat up to three times per 24 hours or as directed by doctor.
* Children under 2 years of age: Ask a doctor.

Other Information

* Store at room temperature.

Questions? Call 1-800-873-8276.

Okay, that's all fine and good, but I still fail to see how a child under 2 years of age can:

  1. Read these directions.
  2. Call a doctor.
  3. Assuming the fucking receptionist will ever actually put the doctor on the phone, is a baby really articulate enough to ask the doctor any questions about the use of this product by someone his/her age?

Hmmmmm? Moving on.

The WARNINGS are as follows (I have made bold the particular sections of interest that relate to the forms of product-abuse engaged in by Jackie and me ):

For external use only; avoid contact with eyes.

Do not use:
  • By mouth
  • With tight bandages
  • In nostrils
  • On wounds or damaged skin

Ask a doctor before use if you have:
  • Cough that occurs with too much phlegm (mucus)
  • Persistent or chronic cough such as occurs with smoking, asthma, or emphysema

When using this product, do not:
  • Heat
  • Microwave
  • Add to hot water or any container where heating water. May cause splattering and result in burns.

Stop use and ask a doctor if:
  • Muscle aches and pains persist more than 7 days or come back
  • Cough lasts more than 7 days, comes back, or occurs with fever, rash, or persistent headache

These could be signs of a serious condition.

If pregnant or breast-feeding, ask a health professional before use.

Keep out of reach of children. If swallowed, get medical help or contact a Poison Control Center right away.

©2007 Procter & Gamble. All Rights Reserved. All copy and claims valid only in the U.S.

I must say, I had never considered microwaving my Vicks before, but...

And, I love the fact that "All copy and claims valid only in the U.S." So, if I am in say, France, I could do ANYTHING with Vicks VapoRub (including putting some on my pooper, for freshness) because none of these warnings would apply there! Awesome.

Of course, it does not surprise me at all that I am an abuser of Vicks VapoRub -- considering Jackie's history of eating it until the age of 30 -- we come from the same maladjusted, Vicks-abusing family. I am quite sure that her older sister, aka my Mommie Dearest, was probably the one who fed it to her for the first time, as their mother probably did to her...Yes, my own mother started me on the path to my greasy-nosed nightmare.

But, there is help out there. Pick up the phone and call the 1-800-number. You'll be glad you did.

/end P.S.A.

[Disclaimer: I make no promises that I will not nasally abuse Vicks VapoRub in the future. I'm just sayin', if I have a bad cold, I may use again. I'll let my sponsor deal with it when the time comes...Thank you.]

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Sunday, October 14, 2007 --- I have been sick...Baby Steps Toward A Greener Life...Part 3

In the midst of my popping Benadryl capsules, smearing Vicks VapoRub on my nose (Yes, despite the directions on the jar, I have always smeared VapoRub on my nose when I am sick to help me breathe!), sneezing and constant nose-blowing -- I have managed to incorporate another "green" change. It's a small one, but every bit helps, right?

That's right, instead of using one tissue after another during the course of my cold, I have opted to start using handkerchiefs! A hankie can be used many more times than the 2-3 nose-blows possible with a tissue. And, when they have gotten sufficiently "soiled", I can throw them in the wash and use them again and again...and again! It occurred to me that it was a great option that was sitting right under my nose [pun very much intended, LOL] because we had a large quantity of brand new handkerchiefs already in our closet. I had brought them home a couple of years ago and forgot about them -- one of the many things salvaged from the man's daddy's house after he died. Ever the old-fashioned-gentleman, Pop had packs and packs of brand new handkerchiefs -- as well as boxes upon boxes of brand new towels, never-worn shirts, every suit ever bought, every pair of shoes, every scrap of anything, etc. Yeah, he had a hording problem...Anyway, it seemed a shame to just toss them and pointless to donate handkerchiefs, so I thought, "These could be useful..." and took them home.

Now, not only is that usefulness proving to be very true, but the man and I have the added benefit of being able to make jokes about my using "another one of Pop's hankies" every time I blow my nose! I like the idea that he stays in our minds and in our lives, in this simple every-day-way, even though he is gone. I like to think this comforts the man.

Aside from my current cold, I periodically suffer from allergies and frequent sneezing -- I sometimes feel like I am forever blowing my nose. Handkerchiefs are much softer than tissues and better for the environment. I am enjoying them in spite of my nasal misery. So, thanks Pop...You are helping us "be greener" from the grave!

Related posts: Baby Steps Part 1, Baby Steps Part 2.

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Tuesday, October 9, 2007 --- Damn You, Michael Jackson, Damn You To Hell...

All You Need Is Luv's - video downloaded from Metacafe

Today, I had the misfortune to see this Godforsaken travesty of music. Truly a turd, which I suppose, is appropriate to the product in question...

All I can say to Michael Jackson regarding this disgusting misuse of The Beatles' music? To quote Joseph Welch's famous words, "Have you no sense of decency, sir, at long last? Have you left no sense of decency?"

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Sunday, October 7, 2007 --- Highlights from the National Zoo...a photographic post.

A lovely bellowing lion...

A Scarlet Ibis preening itself...

A Bald Eagle taking a bath...

...And, an elephant playing in the dirt!

More pictures from the day can be seen on my Flickr page -- see badge in sidebar under "credits".

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Saturday, October 6, 2007 --- Apparently, this is a good place to take a nap...

The bigger Nutmeg gets, the more things she gets into. Not only did she jump into the tub while I was taking a shower today, but she also likes to take a break in the sink periodically. In some ways, this lack of fear with regard to water is a good thing. It means I have very little trouble bathing her when necessary -- because I like to bathe me some cats. Contrary to popular cat-belief, spit does not clean everything well, especially when that spit smells like cat food...

"This carpet has a funny flavor!"

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Wednesday, October 3, 2007 --- Ode to the small Asian woman...on Great Mofo Delurk Day 2007!

This in an Ode, with a capital "O", to the small Asian woman who altered the blazer of my brown Jones New York suit. You are simply amazing...There is no perceivable evidence that this jacket was ever disassembled to make your expert adjustments -- except for the fact, of course, that it fits me perfectly now!

I found this little brown tag stapled to the inside label of my garment, which bears your handwriting. I have no idea what it says, but I suspect it contains secret messages pertaining to the magical spells you perform with your tiny hands and sewing machine on my clothes. I am keeping this tag because it will remind me of you, your excellent workmanship and the very simple happiness I felt today when I tried on my jacket for your final inspection.

Small Asian woman, I do not even know your name, but every time I enter the dry cleaners where you work, you greet me with your warm and enthusiastic smile. This brightens my day for a moment, and for that too, I thank you! Your small moon-shaped face, with its laugh lines and creases of old age, is full of kindness. I like to imagine you being my own tiny grandmother or perhaps a dear great aunt, but we are just strangers. You will never know that I think about you, but I do. And, I hope that you are well-loved.

Today is Great Mofo Delurk Day 2007! Please, don't forget to leave a comment on all of the blogs you read...lurk...stalk...Trust me, you will be making people smile.

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Tuesday, October 2, 2007 --- Tomorrow is...The Great Mofo Delurk 2007!

Tomorrow is the day for all blog-lurking MOFOs to come out of the shadows! Let yourselves be known -- say hello, leave a comment, tell me a little somethin' somethin' about yourselves. Be generous! Break your anonymous habits for the day and leave a comment on all of the blogs you read (stalk) tomorrow. Share the love, Lurkers, stand up and be counted! ;-D

The Great Mofo Delurk 2007 was created by the fine ladies, Schmutzie, Sweetney and JenAndTonic.

You can read more about the inspiration behind The Great Mofo Delurk 2007 on Schmutzie's blog at: http://www.schmutzie.com/2007/09/814-great-mofo-delurk-2007.html. She also created the lovely button(s) for TGMD -- you can grab the code for embedding them on your own blog at the same link.

For those of you who have a colored background to your blog (like me!) and don't want to use the white-backgrounded .JPG version of the button that Schmutzie provides -- I have re-purposed Schmutzie's buttons as transparent .PNG files that you can download in a zip file here. They will show up like mine above -- no white background! You will need to host the image on your own site and the code that Schmutzie originally provided will need to be changed like so:

<a href="http://www.schmutzie.com/2007/09/814-great-mofo-delurk-2007.html" title="The Great Mofo Delurk 2007"><img src="http://www.YOURWEBADDRESS.com/COLOR.png" title="The Great Mofo Delurk 2007" border="0" /></a>

REMEMBER: You need to set the "color" in front of .PNG to the name of the color you are using (black, green, red, pink, purple, grey, blue and orange). ENJOY!

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www.vanessaleehamlen.com - THE BUTTERFLY BLOG - Copyright ©2007 Vanessa Lee Hamlen. All rights reserved.

Would it kill ya?

What I Am Doing...

Follow the_butterfly at http://twitter.com

Twitter Balloon code developed by korelab

About Me

I am a graphic designer. I love animals and have quite a few pets. There is a frustrated DJ inside of me --- hence, my ongoing obsession with making music mixes.

Recent Posts


Musical Goodness

-- Music from Butterfly's personal library --

LORI'S LABOR: A collection of 6 unique playlists with varying intensity and mood for your listening pleasure! I created these original mixes for my friends to use during the labor and delivery of their first baby, Nicholas.

You can visit their blog here: ---> The Bridenstines!

Listen to my comical, purposefully nasal, total HAM-job submission to the 2007 Blogger Christmahanukwanzaakah Online Holiday Concert in the mini-player above!
Links and Friends

vanessa lee hamlen
towhead productions
lizzie sue
the Daily Lizzard
joe hinsburg
fleck family
katie haverly music
joe sorren art
the sneeze
archie mcphee toys
eric joyner robot art
nishant choksi illustration
neth creatures
grammar girl
go fug yourself
jeffrey fulvimari art
don't click it
favourite website awards
paul neave
jared tarbell flash art
liquid journey flash art
my pet skeleton
tobie giddio fashion illustration
van beater art
pure breed revolution
pixel girl
jay bibby game reviews
the mighty jimbo
be the boy
sweet blog o' mine
bent objects - sculpture blog
terry border art
anne taintor - vintage gift items
anne...straight from the hip
the naked rabbit world power foundation
i can has cheezburger
passive aggressive notes
citizen of the month
the daly blog
craxy's blog
john's adventures
guerrilla gardening
kung foodie
this is blythe
deron cohen art
life student
hug nation
march of the hugmobile
tales from the dad side
ikea hacker
easy being green
marc johns's blog - mildly amusing drawings
ideal bite - easy green living ideas
gathering in light - c. wess daniels
schmutzie's milkmoney or not, here i come
we are rantasaurus rex, hear us roar
the "blog" of "unnecessary" quotation marks
lyrical venus
the world's most local burger
readymade: instructions for everyday life
giant microbes
busted tees
inarticulate fumblings
i am the diva
wesley riot
queen of spain
in palinode's palace
mustaches of the nineteenth century
sera faery NEW!
daysies.nu - the daily overdosage NEW!

DO NOT CLICK on the following links if you are under the age of 18! These blogs are not for you...

really bent
where i vent my spleen
cocky bastard
tassy pink

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